But what if.
What if I never find someone?
Mine. The one. My everything.
I try to ignore. I`m good at ignoring. But then, it catches up with me, so devilishly in return. On days like this. On days like this, – worry, anxiety and melancholia wrap me in. So tight. So taut.
Let me breathe.
What if I never find someone?
Mine. The one. My everything.
I want us to be two. I want to be part of a two. Make coffee for two. Dinner together. I wanna read the magazine, while he takes the paper, -and then swop. I wanna borrow his socks. Those who slip right on. I wanna sleep in his shirts. The big, soft ones, – which still smell of him. I want us to make the bed together. See who can finish first. Smile at each other, right before we fall asleep. I want to hold his hand, while walking. Observe, while he goofs around. I wanna nag about toilet seats and splatter stains. I wanna tell my friends. Pretend to be annoyed. While actually, all I`m feeling, is joy.
What if I never find someone?
I`ve been single for a long time now, – but I`ve had enough. I have lived. Lived a lot. Just like they said. I`ve learned, experienced and had my fun. But it`s enough. You up there – or wherever you are- it`s enough now. I want it, as well. I want us to be two. Please? Will you let me be part of a two? All the days that go by. A lifetime. They go by every day. And the turmoil is growing, with each passing day. I want to share it with you. Days. Moments. Thoughts. Love. Madness and Joy. Where are you? Why can’t I find you?
Please come.
What if I never find someone? Am I not supposed to? Isn`t it meant for me? I suffocate. I`m suffocating.
Let me breathe.
Mine. The one. My everything. Why can’t I? Why can`t I miss and be missed? Comfort and be comforted. Love and be loved. Why not me?
The whole world.
But not me.