I almost die.
And still.
All that time spent.
That`s the spirit, isn`t it?
Against all good sense.
Surely, it must be me. There must be something seriously wrong with me. I mean. I`m not at all attracted anymore.
Not to a single one.
No one.
It`s gone so far that I`ve needed to ask myself. Do I look in the wrong places? Am I off target? Could I possibly find myself in the unfortunate column? Maybe girls could be the big thing? Maybe it all would be sorted out, then.
But then again.
I`m crazy about men.
I`m old enough to know.
When driving, my eyes are everywhere.
I see them.
I see them all.
But, WHOOSH-
They`re gone. And off they went.
So where did they go?
Where are the guys I`m attracted to?
Where`s the sweets on the streets?
Where are the blokes without muscles? The guys with no text? Where are the satisfied ones? The cheerful and happy ones?
I mean. Christ.
Everyone on Tinder looks depressed.
They look like they`ve had it.
They`re annoyed. No doubt about it.
They HATE the hunt.
Well. I`m upset, too.
But I keep it to myself.
I sure don`t frame it.
It`s definitely tiresome, and yeah, depressing as hell. But the thing is, I don`t allow it to make such a deep impact. I don`t think I`m any closer in getting a mental disorder, truth to be told. That alone, however, should count as quite the achievement. And it`s really comforting as well.
At least it doesn`t do me any harm.
But nothing is happening, though!
So, what`s the deal?
What am I doing wrong?
I`m sure they`re terrific, but I should want them, shouldn`t I? That`s still a thing, isn`t it? Or are you supposed to give in, take what`s left, in your mid 30s? Keep it from looking strange.
End the misery.
I`m pretty sure they`re all talking by now.
Oh yeah. She`s a handful, mind you. I guess she`s really difficult to live with. And she`ll probably be worse off, in a couple of years. You know, these things don`t get easier. I mean, she`s nice and everything, but something must be off. Clearly, there must be something wrong with her. Or maybe she`s a lesbian? Maybe she just doesn`t know it yet?
If this was back in the old days, I would have been stuck at the farm.
It would`ve been me.
Evidently.
I`d be the one to watch them.
The elderly.
On that account, I should consider myself lucky. There might not be any man at my presence, but at least, I don`t need to peel potatoes all weekend.
Moisturize legs.
Goodness me.
Maybe I should go for a handsome one. Even if that`s all he`s got going. Even though, that`s all he knows how to.
A cranky, good- looking sort of a guy.
So I can make- out, at least
In the meantime.
I`m so looking forward to summer.
Like, really.